Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Juror #142 saw no action

Yes. Jury duty. As a relatively worldly 33 year old American citizen, it may surprise some to know that I had never, until yesterday morning, seen any gleaming civic beacons in my mailbox, beckoning me to some court room to uphold my honor bound duty to use my intellect and unflappable moral fortitude to ascertain the TRUTH.

You see, I was looking forward to this.

Not to mention the idea of an unknown # of hours with which to do nothing but entertain myself.

AKA: knitting time.

Yesterday was going to be the day I completed the last section of the Elsebeth Lavold cardigan. Even 2 hours of uninterrupted knitting would have done it.

So there I was, eagerly awaiting my foray into the world of civic responsibility, grasping my Circles knitting bag breathlessly looking forward to my legal insight and cable panels.

And then...

...they took... knitting needles.

They. Took. My. NEEDLES.

What, I'm going to get all stabby with my Addi Turbos?

I am the PICTURE of UPRIGHT CITIZEN, damnit.

And, if this hasn't been made clear to date, I am not the kind of girl who can sit still. I am a freaky little twitching mess with my need to DO something. Smoking really helps, but it's been like three years since one of those babies has touched my lips, and besides, if anything is going to make me start smoking again, it'll be something way sexier than jury duty.

Like France.

I'd smoke for France, if it was sweet and freshly shaven, and asked nicely while offering a lovely cheese plate.

But I digress.
So, there I was, with what turned out to be 5 hours of sitting around and avoiding the "crazies", with nothing but my newly discovered Armistead Maupin to keep me from running screaming through the corridors desperately clutching the shirtfronts of all passersby begging for the sweet relief of death. Or at very least a cigarette.

And in the end, the hours passed without the dulcet tones of Mr. Courtroom guy asking for #s 125 through 150 to please line up single file and follow him down that coveted hallway.


So anyway, here's a bunch of pictures of some stuff:

No knitting. Bleh.


Anonymous diana said...

Jeezus, I can't believe those bastards took your needles. That's just wrong. Loving the pics of S with the cows. We tried to do the same with LL, but she fell asleep in her stroller. Ah well.

8:28 PM  
Anonymous melanie said...

I thought needles were allowed???!!! If they're allowed on airplanes, they should be allowed in courtrooms. Fuckers.

And, adding to the list of things that makes us parallel beings, I also quit smoking almost three years ago. And now that you mention it, I'd totally pick it up again for France. Maybe we're really the same person.

7:42 AM  
Blogger Kellee said...

I've said it before and I'll say it again, the DAY I turn 70, I am ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY going back to the hedonistic days of my misspent youth and I am SO GOING TO START SMOKING again.

Assuming of course that they're still legal. Who's in?

Oh, and could that kid BE any cuter with the 'cow' milking?

I'm also ignoring the 5 hours without knitting lest I crumble into a heap under my desk.

8:19 AM  
Blogger Jscothammerquist said...

I go to various court houses all the time for work and I have never had a problem.
You musta looked "WRONG"


9:09 AM  
Blogger Dearest Cupcake said...

I bet they'd let you knit in courtrooms in France. Freshly shaven or otherwise. Sacre bleu!

10:13 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bummer about the needles. I had jury duty about a year ago and was thankful they didn't take mine away. Though I was working with bamboo sock needles and not those scary blunt addis! That boy is awfully cute, lady. -Rebecca H.

9:51 PM  
Blogger Dearest Cupcake said...

Yvonne?! Do you mean MY friend Yvonne with ties to Fairlee, VT and a brother named Burt? Diana is going to send you and me eachother's email addresses, and we'll get to the bottom of this. We totally know each other. I think.

6:08 PM  
Blogger Reba said...

Hey! It's me...Reba Porter with the Flintstone feet. How the hell are you!
Actually, I was reading your blog since Dearest Cupcake called me and said "I think you know Joanie loves tchotchke." Now, I don't read many blogs, but I absolutely love to knit and I really remember you. So I've been reading your most recent posts. That giraffe is INSANE and highly admirable. Write me sometime, okay? Dearest cupcake should be sending you my email address. Also,
is my group blog that I never post to any more! Anyhoo, you can see some pics of my knitting adventures there as well as some of my friends'

7:08 AM  

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